Friday, October 17, 2008

expanding on ideas that i shared with my mother over breakfast

please  read the previous post if you haven't yet, as it is full of things, i know its dense, but i do reference it a bit and it is very magical!
so. lets get the facts down.
I'm all for racial equality, its just. not. at Berkeley high, there are clubs and events JUST for Latinos, or Asians, or blacks..but people from various European countries- we get none of that- and I'll bet if i tried to make a club, I'd become 'racist'! it's infuriating. if we have 'African American studies' then we can't we have 'Scandinavian' studies? sure, my ancestors weren't slaves- they were just dirt poor and not allowed to work because they were Irish, or Scottish.
if they have 'Pacific islander and Asian club' why is it racist for me to want an 'Italian' club?
i mean, its kinda annoying. ever year, i see the posters for 'Black Grad.' and other things that i can't be a part of. i don't fit into the tiny bubbles formed in this school. its a mixed school, pretty even, but...
a lot of the kids are so defensive, and it gets on my nerves. if a teacher moves a students seat, and he's[student] black and she's not, she's suddenly 'racist'. the word is thrown around a lot, used to describe 'unfairness' now. it used to have a deeper meaning. it still does, i 'm not saying that real racism isn't around- it is, and that's bad. but lately, it seems that EVERYTHING is biased, not for light skeined people, but against them. I'm lucky to grow up in Berkeley, where  debates fill classrooms, the Obama mobile drives around-yet some still have McCain stickers. it is a very divers place, but i just feel so alone, so un-included when i see signs for the Asian/Pacific Islander Association.
but back to bubbles. i told someone in one of my classes about filling in 'other', i felt rather proud you see, and she said(she's my friend) that why did i do that, they need to know that stuff.' i replied 'well, i didn't see a bubble marked 'Italian-Scottish-Swedish- American' so i filled in other. i don't fit in a bubble, and i most likely never will. nor will practically anyone in this country or many others. we live in a changing world. lets live up to it.
i really, truly urge PPLto fill in other, because there is no bubble labeled with what you are.
i long for a day when the PPL that look over the tests realize- on every test, the 'other' bubble is filled in. every test. i know, in my mind, that this will in all likelihood, never happen. but i keep on dreaming. i too, dream of a colorblind world, a world were no one understands why race or religion would be grounds for discrimination. i know that this won't come to pass until the Millennium( ask your nearest Mormon if you don't know what i mean) but still, that it's coming. maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow. but i have faith that it is coming. and i hope that I'm ready when it comes.

well, now i have finished my little bit about messages to the world and such.
happy stuff of today: i kept my gal: only swear three times. I've been having a problem with swearing, and decided to try to stop. i allowed myself three today, and i stayed within the limit. i feel very happy. 
i found a copy of 'Undertown' a manga I've been wanting to read for months, at the library. i also got a few ideas for SOD during PE. that reminds me!
the last week, we've been doing a tournament in PE, volleyball of course. well, yesterday, the team captain was gone, so I was the sub -captain! me! the best part?. we won both games. I'd been praying to do better- get over my fear of the ball, and i did better. today, we played the second place team( we were in first) and, well. the score was-
42-25.
we had that 42. i even scored 6 of the points! i feel so very, very happy!
well, thats about it.
so, anyway, more later

Thursday, October 16, 2008

psats, Dogear, a tad bit of ranting and a mindstory update

so..been a bit since i lats blogged, but i have been swamped! gone before dawn, back after black( the sky) my days go from 5:00 am to around ten, when i fall asleep. and then there's the middle of the night water trips, or dealing with cat( i am SO sick of ppl telling me to put the cat out- if i do that IT GOES MEOW! and makes even more noise. so! and i'm writing all this while listening to the soundtrack of my life, otherwise known as my youtube playlist, as i have yet to get a functional ipod. i have also moved into my new room. the move into said new room is 95% compeat, i still have some stuff downstairs. anyway, onward!
PSATs
the sophs at BHS took them yesterday. they were ok, some of the math was hard, i didn't know a few words(only one or two!) but i think i did well. although everyone i asked(in a poll afterward) filled in the bubble that society considers them(white, black American, Asian/Pacific islander, Latino/a, i bubbled in other. i know, i know' they need to know, to help me. well, since when does the color of my skin have SQUAT to do with what i know? and besides, i didn't see' Northern European' on there. i didn't see' German' or 'Scottish' or 'Italian' on there!i didn't 'French' on there. i never even saw' European' just white. what about Russia? even though its in Asia, i bet Russians are just 'white' it . makes. me .so. sick! I AM NOT A BUBBLE! I am ANNA *******************(omitting last and middle names) AND I AM "OTHER" so there. i urge you to do likewise. please. for the sake of change. c'mon.
also, they say 'you have 30 minutes. i love that. only- i finish early most times- they tell you not to guess- you get points taken off for wrong answers. so i finished fast. and wrote the climax of my novel, SOD, version 5, in eraser on my desk. it was fun! but i've forgotten my wording. however i recall the idea. i still have my first ever draft of the end. a summery of the end, really, so changed! so, so changed! its v. diff from any of the other ending, and i like it better- i shall reveal this new ending idea to no one!, so if you thought you knew- maybe you don't now! ha!


DOGEAR
dogear is the play i am in. i've been going to rehearsals everyday almost, for about 3 hours. it's hard work, but it is a really great play. the writer is a great guy, and really funny. the plot is as follows- minus awesome suprise ending that even the characters do not see coming!
in a disatopian semi-future, everything is corporate. all coffee is Starbucks, all sandwich's are subway, all books are chain bookstore. the libraries are dead, with no funding. but, enter ian and ell, a middle aged, book store accountant and adventures, idealistic coffee girl, who are pulled into a ..conspiracy to undermine the system and bring back library's, in this play about readers, rebels, and writing your own ending. i'll post show times and places later. it is free.


tad bit of ranting
so i'm mormon, everyone here knows it, right? well, you do now.  most other sects of Christianity don't think of us as Christians, which to me makes no sense, i mean, i believe in God, i Believe in my Savior, Jesus Christ and that He died for my sins and the sins of the world. can't we all get along, please? but no... it seems we can't.
my Pet Peave of the day: when someone tells you to 'just ignore it' DON'T YOU GUYS GET THAT IT JUST DOESN"T WORK FOR SOME THINGS?
so i've been having issues with a couple of Born-agains. i respect that they believe in that, and i'd be perfectly fine with the whole thing, i try to fallow that one bumpersticker' coexist ' written in religious symbols. but THEY won't leave me alone. they tell me daily that i'm' not christian' 'am following the devil' 'am going to burn in hell' and various other things. the first few days i ignored it.( if you want to know how it is they know, i was com paining to a friend about seminary.)
after that, i started saying ' when, i personaly DO believe in Jesus Christ, and axcept Him as my Savior. what is your definition of being Christian?' or  ' believe what you want, and i'll believe what i want. no, can we get back to the math?' or someting like that. finaly, i blew up and shout, at lunch, after many days' fine, see you there' i stoprmed off feeling angery and quite proud. didn't last long, but hey.
a few days before this, he brought up batism for the dead( which, btw, is in the new testement as well!) and i said something like 'well, yeah.  what about ppl that didn't learn about christ?' and he kept going on about everyone knowing somehow, and i'm like 'well, how about the ppl in , oh, say, AFRICA 80 years before his birth? how could they have known?' do they need to burn in hell. its just a little strange...' and turned asreound but he kept going on, and on, and on. so right now i am very sick of bornagains. not all born-agains, just two.but oh!
why cant everyone just respect everyone elses beliefes? for heavens sake!. sigh.
'we claim the privlage of whorshiping almighty God acording to the dictates of our own consience and alow ALL men( and children and women) the same privlege, let them worship how, where or what they may.' the end! i ahgree! unless thebelieve involves : belittling others, killing people. and i'm pretty sure most don't involve those... the POLITICAL part of a religion might, but not the SIRITUAL park. i think. not sure...hmm. but didn't Jesus say ' whatsoever you do to the least[ and presumily all others] of my brethern, you do unto me'? so when someone  condems ME to hell...woohee! i guess ole bornagain better stop. but seriosly. is it really so hard to respect? really? no ones asking you to agree, or convert , just acknolage , and not be mean. 

mind story update
Sod is henceforth my main focus, however i keep a notebook abd computer files with various ideas and storys that i play around with at randown times, including 'DotW' 'Ikenna', ' Whisper of earth and sky'aka 'Remembering Peace', 'unicornboy'(only  mindstory thus far) and ' child of the elements.'
plot summaries will be posted  when i a. have time.
b. creat sentaces to go with ideas.
c. give a back story to the random charater profiles!

anyway, it is late, (but i have no seminary tomorrow, haliluja!) so off i go. i bet no one read this whole thing....

anyway, more later

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Alexander's got nothing on me.

you've all read the story, i presume.
'Alexander and the no good, very bad, horrible rotten day.'
welcome to my world.
lets look at my life yesterday:
5:00 am: get woken early by shower(located just next to my room)
5:20: shower- most warm water gone
6:00-6:15: bike to seminary- in the dark, cold predawn. without gloves. 2 miles. downhill.
6:15-7:00: seminary
7:15- 8:30: do homework from last night
8;30-9:30: PE. we play volleyball. my face and said volleyball become acquaintances. twice. OW!, OW!, OW!; while the other team, made up of boys, laugh, and taunt. every time the score they start cheering loudly, and get on our side of the net, and every time we miss, they laugh and jeer. no sane person would ever, ever, ever even THINK about giving them a sportsmanship award. heck, not even an INSANE one.
9:30 to 10:30: science- nothing much happens.
10:30-11:30: math- what more must i say? i detest numbers!
11:30-12:15: lunch- do more homework. eat. get ready for Lord of the Flies discussion
12:15-1:15: drama- ok, we play games, but..my back HURTS and i feel rather faint.
1:15-2:15: English- still feel ill, can't remember most of Lord of the Flies chapter 7.
2:15-3:15: history- make a poster, feel bad about my lack of artistic skills, get very Hungary
3:15-4:30: go to the north branch of the BPL, do homework.
4:30-6:15: best part of the whole day, a rehearsal for the play I'm in, Dogear(more on this later) though i have more lines than just about anyone, i only need to memorize a few! yay!
6:15-6:39: get to bus stop, get so hungry, i eat the remains of my lunch- an icky, hard sandwich crust.
6:39-7:10: bus ride
7:10-7:16: bike home from bus stop, in the dusk-dark.
7:17: get home, collapse
7:30: dinner
8:00: get ready for bed
8:05-9:00: read 'the Siren Song'
9:05: SLEEP!

and then get up this morning at 5:00 again. oh, the joy.
and today, my rehearsal lasts from 5:00-8:00. lovely.
today:
4 subs
not playing 1 mile- no volleyball, thank starclan!- run in PE, i think id rather do volleyball, so long as i'mMr. hit-the-ball-in-AnnaDee's-face-and-then-laugh-my-butt-off.
but alas.....
up b4 dawn, back after dark, thats me. joy.
anyway, more later.

Monday, October 6, 2008

i WAS going to find a title for this from a book....

but i was lazy.
plus..
ALL MY BOOKS ARE PACKED!
that's right, packed into boxes, 6 of them
because my new room is done and I'm moving in, and I'm getting a new bookshelf, one that reaches the ceiling! but for now, my books are packed.
other reasons for my being so very happy today:
  • i auditioned for a play on Friday- and got in! tomorrow is our first rehearsal!
  • my new room is beautiful!
  • i now have 16 members on BOOKBAT'S WORLD.
  • the fourth Fablehaven book is done- editing starts today!
  • Jessica Day George is writing yet another dragon book, as well as a sequel to 'ball of the midnight princess' which i STILL need to read.
  • i reached a milestone in my novel, SOD. page 55!( and this is computer, microsoft word, no top or bottom margin, no space twixt chapters pages i'm talking about)
  • i came up with about  3 new ideas for mindstorie- finaly! i've been doing repeats and re-runs for almost 2 weeks now!
  • i've been reading a lot of really good books lately!

the stuff that makes me rather un-happy.
  • today, after mentioning that i 'couldn't get through the thrid narnia book'( i just..got bored! i maen, no susan, no story!) someong, who shall remain nameless even after i become a world famose fantasy author( i alow my self ! fantasy future per week) told me that i 'could'nt read worth s***. this made me mad. i mean, how dare he? i mean, maybe i hate lord of the lies, and didn't like 'voyage of the dawn tredder' but..for goddness sakes, i MEMORIZED anidori's speech( you know the one, 'believe me, ther is. no. war!') i've read hundreds of books that were so well written i started to cry, regardless of the happy or sadness of the ending.  just because i think 'twilight' is dumb' or 'dawn treder' is dense( and by that i mean the style of writting, not the inteligence)  that does not mean that i can't read worth 'S***' anyone who knows me knows why i was incredibly tempted to reagrange that anyoing, three inches taller than me, freshman's face. it would have beenb stupid, and i knew it, so i didn't. but, oh, how i WISH i had the power of Windspeaking...oooh!
  • today was science lab. what more do i have to say?
  • the BPL, my best friend and arch nemisis, has 4 copies odf 'book of a thousand days, wich Mom and i were going to read.
  •  2 are checked out. 1 is 'missing' the other is at the north branch. last week, i put in a request. that means they get the book from the branch , bring it to the branch you asked, and it's on the hold shelf..its been over 5 days..nothing. AND the two that are checked out? yeah, they both were renewed. on saturday! i put in the request on thursday. if there's a waiting list, you can't renew something, darn it! or so I was told. but the library seems to think.. at least once a month i get one of those letters: this is your final notice, return " so and such' and pay the fee, ect, ect...' and i'm like, wha? final notice? try FIRST notice. and i returnd that gahbingled thing a week ago, before the due date! so i go, and i stand, and i wait in line, and i say' i returned this, go look.' and they look, and they find it, on the shelf, and say 'sorry bout that,' and take the letter i got and throw it away.. w.t.h.????!!!
but anyway, i'm still very happy right now.
right now, i love the world. dispite humanity's messups, and ickiness and hate and war, beauty is stilll all around. though the gloom of hate surounds, so does the joy  of love.
a quote from a great book, Shadow spinner." i'm not ashamed of loving him, theres nothing wrong with loving someone. it's hateing- that's whats wrong.'
the book treats with a young muslim girl during the end of the thousand and one nights. marjan is a storyteller, inspired by her hero, shararazad. when she tells a tale the queen hhad never before known, she is taken to the queen, to help. when marjan asks how she can love a sultan that would kill her, even if she has just given birth, for failing to entertain him, the words above are her reply. listen to her wisdom.  do not be ashamed to love, never, eveer.
anyway, more later.

Friday, October 3, 2008

and a meow to you too.

10 pts to anyone who can tell me: what book that came from
and who said it! ha, sweert revenge!
my poem went awsome, i had for subs on tusday, wensday was awful, but lets not dwell, yesterday- what happend?
and now: today.
nothing much to say. one quote, from genun.
discusing shakespear, and wether or not he wrote 'his plays' with mr mike, genun breaks in
' of course he wrote them! if he says he wrote them, then he did, just like i wrote the bible'
this struck me as funny!
other funnyness:
1. anyone who has not, go right this second and read sarah beth dursts blog- section 'obscuye fairy tales- its so worth it. link is to you left.
2. bubber stickers!
i saw a great one this morning-"Buckle up... it makes it harder for the aliens to suck you out of your car'

lol!
anyway, more later